Baby I'm A Sinner novel Chapter 77

Dani's POV

I'm in no mood for school a week later, so as soon as my father drops Jade and I off, I join Zack and Lucas behind the school building where I know they must be smoking.

One of the reasons is that I didn't see or talk to Noah since Tuesday, which was the last day he showed up at school. Another reason is that my period was still late, and I had a pact with Emma that we'd go to the doctor today to check out what was wrong.

And it turns out I'm right about the smoking part; Lucas, Zack, and Noah are all leaning against the wall smoking. When I see Noah, I feel this unfamiliar warmth in my stomach, combined with butterflies and a feeling like I might be sick.

He's wearing black skinny jeans, a black shirt, and a White jacket underneath one made out of leather, matched with Black Vans.

"Hiii." I say and start kissing everyone on the cheek, until I get to Noah who turns his head to kiss me on the mouth.

"Where have you been?" I ask him, crossing my arms over my chest in a scolding manner.

"What do you mean?"

"What do I mean? I haven't seen you in almost a week."

"Were you worried?" he asks, grinning. There's something sad in his eyes, even though his smile suggests otherwise, but I don't point it out in front of everyone.

"I was worried."

He changes the subject after that, which means that he probably doesn't want everyone to know where he's been, or he just doesn't want to talk about it at all.

"I'm so not in the mood for school today. And we have that test in History, fuck." I mumble as all of us finally make our way back towards the main entrance.

"Me neither." Noah says, putting an arm around me. "Do you want to skip?"

"Skip school? As in, just history?"

"No, as in, the entire day."

"And do what?" I ask as we stop by my locker so I can get my things.

"I don't know. See a movie. Go out for coffee. Go to my house."

"Well, I definitely can't go back to my house because my mother still hasn't left for work."

"Great then. I'll drive us to the mall."

I sigh. "What if my parents find out?"

"They won't."

"How can you be sure though?"

He raises a brow. "I'm Noah. I'll find a way."

"Alright then."

I close my locker and announce Emma that I'm leaving for the day. She looks at me, and then at Noah, and then back at me.

"You sure?"

I nod.

"Are we still on for today at four?"

"Yes."

"Great, I'll call you when I get out."

I kiss her on both cheeks and then follow Noah back outside, right before the late bell rings.

"What's going on at four?"

I panic. "Uh...Emma and I are going to um-she's going to buy contraceptives and wants me to come along with her since she's never done that before."

Noah frowns, but doesn't say anything else. We get into his car and soon enough, due to his crazy driving, we arrive at the mall that's just opened for the day.

"Starbucks?" he asks and I nod.

"Of course. Have you forgotten who you're talking to?" I laugh.

He smiles and holds the door of the coffee shop open for me, before he follows me inside. The two people behind the counter look at us annoyed, probably wishing they wouldn't have to start their jobs so early in the morning.

I order a Caramel Latte and he orders a Caffè Americano, before we go to sit down in a corner.

"Noah?"

"Hm?"

He looks up from his drink.

"Do you trust me?"

"Yeah, of course."

"Then will you tell me why you weren't at school last week?"

"No, it's not that."

I raise a brow.

"I was in the hospital."

"What?"

My heart starts beating faster, and I have to remind myself that he's literally right in front of me, which means that he must be okay on some level.

"What for? Are you okay?"

"My mother saw these." He explains and pulls the sleeves of his right hand up to show me a trail of horizontal scars leading all the way up to his elbow.

My heart sinks in the pit of my stomach and I feel like I'm about to cry, but I try not to show it.

"Why?"

"Why did she see them?"

"No, why did you do it."

He shrugs. "My parents were fighting really loudly so my grandparents had to take Elliott and Rose in for a few days. Plus I had some problems with insomnia and shit. It all got too much and I just had to."

I place my chin into my palm and look at his arm. I wonder if it hurts and how and why and where.

"So she took you to the hospital?"

"I was changing in my room when she came in to tell me that we had to leave for a record label party my dad was throwing that night, but then she saw the scars and they postponed the whole thing in two weeks. Like it's a big deal." He mumbles.

"It is a big deal. I would've been worried too." I make a short pause. "Where did they take you?"

"Manchester Mental Health."

"Oh."

"Yeah. They placed me on 'suicide watch'." He says, snorting.

"It's not something to laugh about."

"Like I'd ever kill myself."

"Well, everyone would think so judging by the scars." I say and trail my fingers over them, before I pull his sleeve down because I can't look at them any longer.