Hurt novel Chapter 5

Luna POV

It's been two years now, I guess things should be going well with us. No, it is not. I still have nightmares, and I get scared over little things. I keep wondering if he was dead. I had this feeling in the back of my mind that something was not right, but Lia kept saying I am paranoid.

"I just don't believe Mr. Rogers was dead; he could be faking it. That man did a lot of things to people, and he can't be easily killed now that I think of it.

It's not the first time he was poisoned, a lot of females in that compound had tried to do the same, but they were caught and punished, not just any punishments. He made sure his guards took round in raping them, after they were done, he would use his special belt to flog them.

Nobody tried to kill him again after they witnessed what he did. So for him to be poisoned and killed just didn't sit well with me." Whenever I brought it up with Lia, she got angry and said I was just frightened that he was dead.

She would say, "my friends have checked everywhere and have done some DNA test on him, babe, he's dead, you don't need to worry." I guess she's right; I am paranoid, I haven't been thinking straight, I should focus on our relationship and my kids.

Ever since we moved here, Lia has been so gentle with my kids and me; she made sure we were well fed, made us take medications, took us in for therapy even though she was really busy.

She made time for us; this was why I love her. Over the past year, Lia and I never initiated anything sexual. I was getting confused. Doesn't she like me anymore? Is it because of the scars on my body? I kept questioning myself, I need to talk to her.

My kids have been better. Madison is more active than Addison. Although Thea has always been a quiet girl, she talked less. People always think she could not talk at all, but my baby girl is just a shy type.

Madison and Lia got along, they tried to get Addison to be involved in everything they did, but she always refused. I was getting worried for her. I didn't like how quiet she was becoming, at least we talked more when we were in Mr. Roger's home, but now she's shutting me out, and it's so frustrating, but I have to be patient with her, that was what our therapist suggested.

I don't know if she's opening up to the lady; I don't think so. The lady just tells us we should be patient and that one day, she would tell us what was bothering her.

My girls are starting school today. I was so excited and nervous for them. It's their first time going to school, although Mr. Rogers made sure to bring teachers to teach them at the compound. I guess that's the only thing he did right for my children.

Girls get down here; it's time for breakfast, Lia yelled for them. They came running down.

"Good morning, Mama," Maddy said, kissing my cheek. Addy just nodded at me, seriously! Am your mother, that's all I get? I said in my mind.

"Alright, I'll be dropping you guys off today, but from tomorrow, Mr. D will be taking you to school. Is that alright with you guys?"

"Yes," Maddy said. We all looked at Addt; she looked down, feeling shy.

"Come on, tell me." Lia went closer to her.

"Can't I ride my skateboard to school? I don't want to go with Mr. D,"

"Alright, whatever you want," Lia said, kissing her on her head. See! She likes when she does that to her, but when I try to make contact with her, she refuses to let me touch her, even to hold her hand. What did I do wrong? I asked myself, holding my unshed tears.

I didn't want my kids to see me like this. Today was supposed to be a happy day for them, so no crying, I said to myself.

"Alright, kids, let's get going, bye Amour," Lia said, pecking my lip.

"Good, bye kids, good luck on your first day," I said, waving my hand at them. They waved back at me.

Addison

I was so nervous, I have never gone beyond the compound, and now I am supposed to go to school and surround myself with many people. It was what my therapist suggested.

She thinks if I am around a lot of people, I would feel better. She just didn't understand; I hate being around people.

I knocked on the door, a female teacher opened it; thank goodness it was a female teacher.

"Hi, sorry for coming late, we could not find this class."

"No problem, come in," she said, opening the door wide for us.

"Alright, girls, introduce yourself."

"My name is Madison, and this is my sister Addison," I said, glaring at her when I knew she wouldn't talk. She just nodded at them. Everyone was staring at us like they hadn't seen a girl before.

I was starting to get nervous with the way they were looking at us. Did I say something bad? Is my dress not okay? Was my hair not in the place I wondered? The teacher touched my shoulder.

"Don't mind them. You girls are the first identical twins they would ever meet... I am just joking, but can't you see how they are staring at you girls? You are very beautiful," she complimented us.

"Thank you, Ma'am," I said, blushing like it was the first time someone had said I was beautiful. Well, apart from Mom and our therapist, we don't usually go out a lot, and when we do, we're always told we are pretty but not beautiful.

To me, being pretty means you're just attracted to my body, but when you say beautiful, it means my body, my soul, my scars, everything about me, but who the hell would fall in love with someone like me, I guess I'll just go to college, get a house, adopt children and have a dog. I mean, nobody will love all of me. I know this.

My Mom was just lucky to have Lia with her, but I know I'll never be lucky like her. I'll never find love. I am negative again.

"Okay, girls, go over there. It is the only empty seat, and I can't change seats since I have done the seat arrangement already, or Dani can sit with Madison while Addison you sit with Violet.

Alright, let's continue, so we were discussing..."