Should I Stay or Leave? novel Chapter 1

I closed the door.

Blag!!

It could have hit me if not for the door. I took a deep breath, went downstairs to pick up my son, and left.

This is one of those days where I asked myself should I stay or should I leave? But until now, I can't seem to decide. All I do is cry at night with only the walls listening to me.

You might wonder, was I battered? No!

Loved? I don't know!

Cared for? Maybe!

Then the next question you might ask is why? My name is Kamiah, and this is my story.

She was 2 days late. The tracker had rung its notification to alert her if she had failed to update it. But she did not. Three days ago, she started spotting. Usually, that's how her period starts. Then, after a day or two comes the normal menstrual bleeding. But that's not what happened. Instead, for three consecutive days, all the experience was light spotting. She feels weird. It never happened before. So, she got herself a pregnancy test.

After five days of light spotting, she did the test first thing in the morning. She was anxious during that few seconds of waiting to see how many lines would show up. Finally, a LINE showed. And she sighed with relief.

For the following days, the spot is gone, but no period as well. She started asking herself was stress the culprit of making her period act unusually. She did not think about pregnancy. She did the test already, and it showed that she failed the test of becoming a mom. So, she decided to give it a few more days or even a month.

A month passed; still, her period did not come to visit her. Her intuition is screaming of "Pregnant, Pregnant" again. But she was not feeling nauseous, didn't vomit, and didn't have food cravings or aversions. Sure, she has mood swings like any other woman, and it can happen anytime. But to quiet the voice inside her head, she decided to buy two of those pregnancy tests again. This time, she decided to do the test immediately upon arriving home. She doesn't want to wait until the following day. If she is pregnant, it should show right away.

There she is again, looking at that pregnancy test doing its job. She feels like it was slow this time. Then, voila, TWO LINES.

"It is not hard to answer if you know what you want. Anyway, we have to talk as soon as possible. I can't stay here for too long. I need to plan my life. I need to look for a job and get ready to raise this child."

He did not respond to her last message. "What I am going to do?" she thought. She closed her eyes and covered her mouth. Her cry is getting louder and louder. She is worried that her roommate might wake up because of it. She wanted to calm herself. So, she opened Netflix and decided to watch "The Notebook." She tried to divert her mind from thinking and worrying. She wanted to fall in love and cry through Nicholas Sparks' story. And she wanted to be able to give a perfect excuse if in case her roommate waked up and asked why she was crying. But, actually, the main reason she wanted to watch it is that she wanted to believe in love. She wanted to feel and think that she had that kind of love. She used to not appreciate the movie that she could not even finish watching it. But now that she is so sad and has a lot on her head, she was able to finish it. And surprisingly, she loved it.

It has been a week since she and Acwell had exchange messages on Whatsapp. She was debating within herself whether to send him a message or not. But, in the end, sending a message won.

"How are you? Are you feeling better now?"

"I am still having a cold and a fever that goes on and off." He replied.

"Let me know when you feel better so we can talk."