Should I Stay or Leave? novel Chapter 8

But the feeling he has for Catrina could not equate to the love he feels for Kamiah. It is more of the guilt and pain knowing that someone has to go through such suffering all because of him. However, the decision of him and Catrina to separate is still one of the best decisions he ever made. He does not regret doing it. All the more, he does not regret marrying Kamiah.

He watched Kamiah sound asleep. She had been washing a bunch of dirty clothes and cleaning the house. She could not finish but with a baby that requires 24-hour care, she did well. He appreciates it but he is not very good at showing it.

"I know I don't tell you often how much I love and appreciate you, but I do," he said and kissed her before going to sleep. He decided that tomorrow he would wake up early so he can prepare breakfast for her.

The next day, he did what he planned to do. It made him feel good to help his wife and to see her smile with the simple gesture he did. She even hugged him before going to work. But while heading to work, he also checked on Catrina.

"I hope you are feeling better now."

"I am. I decided I would call her even during my break time at work so I don't miss her that much."

"That is good. You should do that."

"I will. Thank you! How are you?"

"I am fine. Now, I have to go to work."

Kamiah never expected how busy she would be. She is at work 9 hours a day and 6 days a week. She only has one day off. And she doesn't even spend it relaxing but doing all the household chores that keep piling up. This is because she prioritizes Kai like any other mother would do. She leaves everything when she hears him cry. She would sometimes forget to eat but not forget what she has to do as a mother.

One night, Acwell came home finding dishes unwashed, laundry not folded and the apartment a little dirty. He saw Kamiah was in the rocking chair, feeding Kai.

"Hello!" he said, but with an unhappy tone.

"Hello, honey! How are you?" she answered with a smile.

"What have you been doing?" Acwell raises his voice suddenly.

"What do you mean?"

"Then, why?"

"Because of our son! I am not a mother who will neglect her child for the sake of finishing the never-ending household chores. He is my priority!"

Acwell was stunned that Kamiah yelled back at him. He made her so angry. She has always been calm except now. This is the first time she had been like this to him.

"You think I am just sitting here doing nothing. Why won't you try taking care of your son the whole day and do the household chores in that way you would know what I go through? You are just working and do little here at home, yet, you complain about how tired you are. What about me? I worked, too. But I still have other things to do. For you to call me lazy, that is so inconsiderate of you. Your daughter's mother was brilliant at deciding to raise her by herself. She is strong in doing that. But for sure, she will have moments similar to mine. And for the record, I did not choose for her to be alone. You both made that decision. So you do not have every right to throw it against me."

Then she storms out of the room carrying her sleeping son. There she is again on the sofa, crying while looking at the wall. Acwell hears her but prefers not to talk. He is still angry. He wanted to calm himself before he even could talk to her. He doesn't want to make the same mistake of saying something that would deeply hurt her. He went straight to the front door to go for a walk and reflect on what he did.

Kamiah watched him open the door and leave. This is the second time they argued. The second time her daughter comes into the picture. And now, he has the nerve to walk out of the house.

"Why is this issue always coming back? Why there is no end to it? What I did for me to get blamed for what her daughter's life turns out?" she asked herself. "Can he not see how much it hurts? He just doesn't know that whenever she remembers he has a daughter, it pains her a lot. All the more to be blamed for her daughter to grow up without a father."