The Alpha and The Vigilante novel Chapter 73

Cain put his hand on my shoulder as I continued to hold Carter's dead body and sob. He was dead because of me.

Cain didn't say anything, which I was grateful for. I wasn't sure I could stop myself from killing him if he said anything cliché or corny.

His men were silent as they took in the bloodbath in front of them. I didn't know why none of them could feel the same tearing pain in their chest like I felt. It felt like a gaping bullet wound. I struggled to catch my breath. Something was seriously wrong.

It... hurts.... so bad.... I gasped out to Cain.

I know, pup. It's part of being a Luna. Your bond with the pack members is stronger than it is when you're a Gamma. You feel pack deaths more painfully, Cain's voice in my mind was apologetic.

Don't you feel it? I asked Cain. He seemed saddened by Carter's death, but not as intensely pained.

I've been the Alpha for over a decade. You get used to the feeling... somewhat, Cain rubbed my shoulders soothingly. I couldn't believe how he was able to keep his calm during such a devastating time. The pressure on my chest felt like it was going to cave in at any moment. We should get you back inside. Clean you up. You'll get sick if you're in the snow too long.

My body felt numb to the cold of the snow, and Carter's blood on me was the last of my concerns. Rose... Lily... I cried.

I know, Ares. They will be taken care of. I will make sure of it, Cain promised me.

After a few more sobs, I somewhat collected myself. I placed a kiss on Carter's cold cheek, and set him gently on the ground. Cain offered to pick me up, but I shook my head.

Rage burned bright inside of me. The rogues had no idea what they just did. Because of them, a woman lost her mate. A baby lost their father.

I summoned an axe, and walked over to the rogue that killed Carter. The knife was still embedded in his forehead, and I was angry he didn't die a slow, painful death.

I lifted the axe high, and brought it down hard on his neck, severing it completely from his body. I did the same with his other limbs, until his body parts were scattered around in red snow.

I moved to another rogue's dead body, and summoned a knife. I sobbed as I stabbed his corpse over and over until his body was so mangled, his features were indiscernible.

I mutilated all of the other bodies with various weapons until the snow was coated in thick blood, and random body parts were strewn about.

One week later

I chugged from the vodka bottle, ignoring the slight burning sensation. I offered it to Gwen, who gratefully took my lead and chugged some of it herself.

Gwen coughed after the gulps, and held it out to Rose, who also took a few sips. Rose handed it back to me and I finished the bottle on my own.

Lily happily sat on Rose's lap, completely oblivious to the pain Gwen, Rose, and I all felt.

Since Carter's death, us four were inseparable. We all felt his death profoundly, especially Rose, who was inconsolable. After the funeral, it seemed like she slightly made more peace with her mate's death, but any idiot could see the amount of pain she was in.

Gwen had been best friends with Carter since they were pups. They had literally grown up doing everything together. She punched 7 holes in the wall after finding out about his death.

Rose didn't want to stay in the house she used to share with Carter alone, and I didn't blame her. She slept on the Pack House couch, Gwen slept in the recliner, and I slept on the floor. We had been doing that for the past week. Rose woke up screaming more often than not, causing little baby Lily to start crying immediately.