The Runt novel Chapter 12

**trigger warning**

He believed his father – he just trusted his words and believed every single one of them.

You didn't give him anything else to consider! Nova angrily retorts, furious I didn't defend myself when I had the chance with Alpha Kace. We're in serious trouble here, she adds on pointlessly. I know the situation I We -we are now in is somehow, miraculously even worst than the one we were in two days ago. I wouldn't have believed it possible but it is true, the situation has deteriorated even worst and the quasi-ally I had in Alpha Kace is now gone completely. If he didn't hate me before, he certainly does now.

So when I feel the sensation on my lips and in my groin area – at first of tingling but then full-on burning, I know without a doubt Alpha Kace is no longer on my side. I shouldn't be surprised he's paying me back by being with someone else but experiencing the pain of his infidelity first-hand is something else entirely – like my skin is being held over open flame. I race to my shower and turn the water on as cold as I can stand it, my skin literally steaming as the water comes in contact with it.

Crying, begging silently for it to end it only seems to take longer and part of me can't help but admire his endurance. I remain in the shower, even as I vomit up the contents of my stomach – my body having a difficult time coping with the pain. Dots and blobs of darkness begin skirting into my vision and I know I'm going to pass out and yet the pain continues, the burning never-ending.

With scattered thoughts of clarity of doing anything to make the agony end, I reach up and grab my razor. It takes more tries than I am willing to admit for me to break it into pieces and release the two blades within. The center part of the blades have dulled from use but the ends are perfect for what I need and I use one without hesitation.

I'm still sitting on the floor of my shower with the water pounding down fast so as the beautiful, contrasting colour pumps out of me, it disappears down the drain. Can't say I'm not courteous – clean up will be a breeze for whoever finds me. With a hand much weaker than the first one, I slice my second wrist then lay both arms down beside me, hands resting on the shower floor. I cry softly in disappointment of myself for getting to this point – in all of my years, even at my lowest when I was so sick no one knew if I was going to make it or not, I never once entertained ending my own life.

Not once.

I love you Penny, Nova whispers as her voice fades to nothingness.

I love you, Nova, thank you for always being the one true constant in my life, I whisper back as I close my eyes. The effort to keep them open is far too great so surrendering to the darkness is easier, and I go willingly. This is how I'll escape this nightmare; this is how I'll go out on my own terms – as my own person while I'm still 'me'... this is how the world is going to be rid of Penelope Andrews once and for all.

Hello darkness, my new friend.