The Runt novel Chapter 14

Penelope has been unconscious for eleven days now – she hasn't woken up once. My father also hasn't been to visit her – not once. For someone in a relationship of any sort with her, I would expect something better from him. I've been here every single day, only leaving as pack business demands. She may have chosen someone else over me and broken my heart but she is still my mate, and clearly something is wrong.

People happy with their state in life don't do what she did.

Being kept as my mate in name only doesn't sound like any life I would want but she's the one who chose that path, not me. I wanted her for me, as my Luna and mother to my pups – not as some fucking 'power supply' while I screw someone else. She's the one who chose a life that in truth will be nothing more than existing from day to day – she won't have my pups, her and I will never mate – I'll never claim her as mine. She'll watch from the sidelines, giving me the strength I need to be an all-powerful Alpha while I mate with someone else and have a family with another she-wolf.

Goddess, no wonder she did what she did.

But she chose this route in life – not me! If she had just waited, I was working on my father – I have no doubt he said something to her or even threatened or bribed her but in the end, he won. He got what he wanted and will get what he wants – me mated to the Luna he desires to see me with, producing the heir he envisions. I'm the marionette puppet who allows him to pull my strings as he's always done and unless I make a change, will continue to do. He plays dirty and I know this yet every time he gets a victory – like this one with Penelope, it is such a devastating loss to me that any desire I have in me to fight back is drawn right out of me.

He nearly sucks my will to live.

KACE, MISUNDERSTANDING

Is it possible she wasn't going along with what was happening but was maybe in shock? Or too afraid to fight back or speak against my father? Goddess, is it possible I misread the entire situation?

You're a fucking asshole – of course you misread the situation! I told you that from the start! Phoenix's attitude toward me has not improved as time moves on and Penelope doesn't wake up. It has been two weeks now since her attempt and nothing has changed in her status.

My father is a scary man – he intimidates the shit out of me, so I can't imagine how a tiny, young woman like Penelope would feel in his presence. Likely overwhelmed, maybe even threatened. He was on top of her so her ability to fight back would have been minimal at best and maybe she didn't scream for help because she fucking couldn't.

The fact that he doesn't deny it and instead practically admits it – at least to me he does because I know of the type of man he is. Ruthless – willing to do whatever it takes to get what he wants and, in this case, I strongly suspect that despite his words what he wants is... Penelope. Dastardly – able to do what it takes to get what he wants, in this case assault a much physically weaker Penelope to get what he wanted.

Oh Goddess what have I done?!

No, she didn't speak out against him – not in front of him, most people wouldn't have the courage or strength. Hell, I still find it difficult if not nearly impossible to stand up to my father so how can I expect Penelope to? I should have spoken to her privately, or at least tried to but why would I have done that? I didn't do it once the entire time she was here – I pulled her from her home and brought her here only to then ignore her except for the dinners my father insisted she join us for. She only thinks I was ignoring her of course – she has never been out of my thoughts of a second, not even when I close my eyes at night, she's there. She has seeped into every pore of my body and I couldn't be happier about it – this is what having a mate is supposed to feel like except in a good way, not full of sorrow and grief. Not worry and despair but rather joy and love – neither of us have had that yet, not once and all because of my father. Right from the start I've done nothing but worry about his reaction, what he was going to think – so much so that I didn't embrace having a mate to the degree I should have. I made my mate feel unwelcome and unwanted, to the point where my fucking father felt since I wasn't going to 'have' her, he may as well.

I think I'm going to be sick.