Her Mate, The School's Player novel Chapter 44

"You're going to what?!" he asks softly with shock.

"Give the up, I'm not ready, not ready at all."

"But. Amber, we've only just found out, you'll be ready soon, you'll be ready by the time they're born."

"I don't think I'll ever be Damian, not till a few more years. I'm still a teenager and I still want my childhood, I don't want to ruin the tiny amount I have left."

"You think our family has ruined your childhood, you'll never know if you're ready until you try, Amber. You can't make a decision like that without me."

"But it's my body and babies."

"But they're also my babies!" he says furiously.

"Things won't work out..."

"Do what you fucking want then, but those babies aren't going anywhere. If you want to give them to someone else, I'll take them and look after them, you won't have to see them again after they're born."

"Bu-but what about u-us?" I whisper.

"What us, Amber? You don't want us to be a family and I do. So I think it's pretty clear what happens after I take the twins!" And with that he storms out of the room, slamming the door behind him leaving me shocked, depressed and alone. Did we just break up? He can't pressure me into keeping them and making me choose between a family or no one. He leaves me no choice, that's not fair. He can't leave me after the babies are born, he just can't. I thought he was in love with me and I was in love with him but maybe they were more lies in my lie of a life.

"Oh my god, congratulations man!" Paul grins. Their smiles turn into frowns when they look back at me. "What do you mean she doesn't want them?"

"She's not ready, she's giving them up for adoption," I weep.

"She's already made the decision?!" Devon asks softly with alarm. I nod, I couldn't speak. I felt like a right idiot about to cry in front of them. I couldn't hold it in anymore and I let it all out. She doesn't understand or realise how much she is hurting me with this decision. I know she's going through a lot, probably a lot more than me but I can't know for the rest of my life that someone else has my children. I can't miss their first words, crawl, steps, laugh, smile, walk, run, cycle, birthdays, the first time they say Dada and Mama, I can't miss all these precious moments.

I know people don't see me as the father type but I've loved kids since forever. Maybe it was because my childhood was ruined at a young age and I want to go back to then to get it back so I play with kids. I guess it makes me feel like a kid again and reminds me all that I missed. I don't want our children to miss out on those things too like me. I'm looking forward to being a Dad and holding them, looking after them and watching them grow up. I'm so happy and what makes me even happier is that I'm having two babies with the girl I love and want to be with the rest of my life.

She is perfect to me in every way and I would never want to hurt her. I want to look after her, get married to her, have kids with her, grow old with her. All these things are our future, well I thought they were. But I ruined it by getting mad today and storming off. She's going to want to leave me now and mate with someone else. I need to let her know how I feel. We need to talk about this, both of us tell each other how we feel.